Articles

If children are the future, parents must be the present

Children are our future - teach them well and let them lead the way.  OK, so it’s a somewhat hackneyed philosophy, and possibly even a direct quote from Whitney Houston, but it’s not that far off the mark.  And when it comes to technology it’s spot on.

Today’s whizz-kids are already the early adopters and even experts in new technologies, and will continue to be the innovators and even leaders of tomorrow.  As parents, all we have to do is guide them along the way.  Beautifully simple.  Of course, as with all great philosophies – as well as all aspects of being a parent – the reality is never quite that straightforward.

When it comes to matters pertaining to technology, it’s as often as not the kids who end up teaching the parents.  While the babies of the internet age typically take to technology like ducks to digital waters, mums and dads are often left floundering in their wake.  A recent UK online centres survey looked specifically at this issue for mums and dads from lower socio-economic groups.  It found that while three quarters of parents knew their children were regular internet users, more than half of them didn’t think they had the skills to help or even supervise their children’s online activities.

Perhaps a worse fate than floundering in your whizz-kids’ wake is drowning in the sea of misunderstanding and misdirection.  If what you know of the internet comes mainly from the media, there’s an internet predator, fraudster or cyberbully lurking around every online corner.  Around 60% of parents in our survey admitted to worrying about their children using the internet, with these three issues above topping their list of concerns.

Let’s make no mistake, not everything online is either safe or straightforward, but then not everything is safe and straightforward off-line either.  We’re just more used to steering our children through real life than through web-life.  The fact is that being a 21st century parent – as I know from personal experience - increasingly requires new parenting skills.  It’s not just about preparing your children for the big wide world anymore, you’ve got to look out for them on the world wide web too.  Reassuringly, nearly all of the parents we surveyed – 96% - recognised the internet as beneficial to their children’s technological skills and general education.  Indeed, almost as worrying as not being able to help with online safety was not being able to help with homework projects or research on the internet.  Evidently offline parents have an appetite for online parenting.

For me, the real issue here is one of equality.  The digital divide isn’t a generation gap: it’s a poverty trap.  Three quarters of people counted as being socially excluded are also digitally excluded.  That means families already at a social or financial disadvantage are three times more likely to be offline.  In turn, that makes poorer parents more likely to be the ones worrying about their kids on the internet, and about their own ability to help and supervise them.

Fortunately, the digital divide between online and offline families and the effect of new technologies on children’s lives have become of increasing concern to government.  Over recent months we have seen the initiation of the Byron Review into children’s gaming and internet use, and the announcement of a Home Access Taskforce to provide poorer families with help to access a computer and internet connection.  These are clearly great steps forward, but my continuing concern is that the focus of debate remains on schools and children, not on parents.

What we really need is to achieve digital equity and opportunity for children and parents together.  Just adding technology to the mix isn’t going to cut it.  Putting an offline family online cannot allay parents’ very real fears about the internet or empower them to help their children – and themselves – make the most of it.  In fact if we don’t include parents we risk excluding them further - not just from technology, but from their children’s social lives, education and even welfare.

Technology has already changed how we live, work and socialise - now it’s changing the way we bring up our children.  The kids of the Web 2.0 generation still want to be able to go to their parents with online issues in the same way as they do for any other problem, so mums and dads need to catch up.  Parents’ access to technology is one thing, but more important is access to the skills to use it effectively.  Unless we achieve a combination of the two, internet safety fears could be holding back the very families we want to stop from falling further behind.  Get it right today, and we bequeath a better, safer world for all children from all backgrounds to lead tomorrow.

Helen Milner

Managing Director

UK online centres